Congratulations on your debut release of One and Done and thank you for taking part in the Author Interview.
What was the thing that influenced you to start writing?
My horrible dating life! In 2009, I was in my mid-thirties, newly divorced/single, and completely clueless as to how to go about dating in the 21st Century! Between all of the dating apps, the birth of texting, and of course, all of the social media sites, I was overwhelmed. Which led to some poor decisions on my part in terms of whom I chose to go out with.
Having met my ex-husband in law school, and most of my other boyfriends previously in college at frat parties and campus bars, I was besieged with <pop> culture shock. Plus, I had always had very traditional views when it came to courtship. So seeing many of my girlfriends now seemingly chasing after guys, I was confused. Had dating really changed that much since I left the scene in 1997? What happened to being pursued? And being selective? It seemed like the older we women got, the more desperate we became. Which led us to lay down our swords, so to speak, and accept dates with men we typically wouldn’t have batted an eyelash at years ago.
And to make things worse, once we agreed to go out with these unsuitable suitors, we almost ended up disappointed and single once again a short time later. I couldn’t figure out what was going on. And more importantly, I was kind of sick of constantly dating guys who, despite knowing weren’t the right fit for me from the get-go, I dated nonetheless. And then I either got dumped, or was forced to dump them because of their unacceptable behaviour. Hence, the need for a tactical strategy arose, and OAD came to life.
My plan entailed drastically cutting down the amount of dates I would go on with each guy. Down to just one. One date per guy only. Ever. And my plan was to have as many first dates with as many men as possible, for a maximum of one full year.
So, before I met him, before he uttered his first words to me, before he even asked me out, I met my date with the stagnant, preconceived notion that I’d never see him again after our one encounter. Why did I do this? Because I needed to start listening to my gut by being completely honest, objective and in control when it came to asking myself the basic question, “Do you like him?” If I even thought there was a “but” which followed my “yes”, he was done. I didn’t want to waste my time with men who weren’t right for me anymore. So, by going into the date knowing it was the first, last and only date with him, it really gave me a lot of clarity and objectivity when it came to answering that question.
Tell me your success stories in terms of publishing/self publishing?
Being an attorney, I’m just happy I figured out where to go and how to do it – that is my lone success thus far.
What are your top writing tips for any aspiring writer?
Preserverence. It took me 6 years to complete OAD. I had a full time job and lots of life events sprinkled therein during that time. I wrote whenever I was afforded a break.
What are you working on now?
I have a few (non-literary) ideas which have sprung from OAD, but nothing in motion yet. I am also exploring a concept for a partially fiction (yet based on some true events) book in the crime/legal drama genre with a big twist/reveal at the end.
What do you draw on for inspiration?
Real life events that are unbelievable but for the fact that they actually occurred.
Please tell me anything else you'd like the reader to know about you.
I am now 44 years old, currently residing in NYC with my husband, JT.
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